i swear i am going to get some work done this morning. right after i curl up with c for a little snuggle. his turn home today with a cold.

i have decided that i am sabotaging my grad school apps. if i don't finish them, no one can say no i guess. or yes, which might be even scarier. so i have been just putting things off and letting things pile up. i am so worried about the outcome either way that i am making myself sick. the ADD is kicking in and i am making lists and planning essays, but i can't seem to get it together and get them completed. it's terrifying either way. i have survived school so far with a carefully crafted system of routines (and some creative procrastinating). i am dreading starting over again as much as i know it's what i want to do.

so today...back to work. personal statement and writing sample will be completed.

right after that nap with c.