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<title>purple elephants corner</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/" />
<modified>2007-01-18T20:18:19Z</modified>
<tagline></tagline>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2007:/purple/11</id>
<generator url="http://www.movabletype.org/" version="3.121">Movable Type</generator>
<copyright>Copyright (c) 2007, purple elephant</copyright>
<entry>
<title>A Rather Blustery Day…</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2007/01/a_rather_bluste.html" />
<modified>2007-01-18T20:18:19Z</modified>
<issued>2007-01-18T20:16:29Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2007:/purple/11.4080</id>
<created>2007-01-18T20:16:29Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">Of all the blog posts I’ve written, ranting about the striking inefficiency of the C1 bus service, you would think that today Cambridgeshire bus services would have used the severe weather warning as an excuse to give up altogether. So...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Who knows?</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>Of all the blog posts I’ve written, ranting about the striking inefficiency of the C1 bus service, you would think that today Cambridgeshire bus services would have used the severe weather warning as an excuse to give up altogether.</p>

<p>So I woke up, at 5.45am to the sound of the C1 slowing down to tackle the speed bumps at the end of my block, quite happy to contend with the wind that was tearing through my pipes.</p>

<p>At 5.55am, as I was sipping upon my first cup of coffee and booting up the computer - there it was again.</p>

<p>At 6.05 as I was fighting with a particularly embarrassing paragraph of the novel - well blow me if the C1 didn’t come chugging happily past my window once more.</p>

<p>Needless to say, 500 words, an hour and six buses later, I finally had to accept that I wasn’t going to get out of work today.</p>

<p>I even got there EARLY.</p>

<p>I wouldn’t mind but in a week’s time when the weather is back to normal again and I come stumbling through the doors 20 minutes late, cursing and swearing about the bus service in this city, who is going to believe me?</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>In case you didn&apos;t know..</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2007/01/in_case_you_did.html" />
<modified>2007-01-15T19:35:38Z</modified>
<issued>2007-01-15T19:34:16Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2007:/purple/11.4076</id>
<created>2007-01-15T19:34:16Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">What Kind of Reader Are You? Your Result: Dedicated Reader You are always trying to find the time to get back to your book. You are convinced that the world would be a much better place if only everyone read...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Books</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<table style="width: 320px; border: 1px solid gray; font: normal 12px arial, verdana, sans-serif; background-color: white;"><tr><td colspan="2" style="background: white; color: black; padding: 5px;"><b style="font: bold 20px 'Times New Roman', serif; display: block; margin-bottom: 8px;">What Kind of Reader Are You?</b> <div style="font-size: 16px; margin-bottom: 4px;">Your Result: <b>Dedicated Reader</b></div><div style="width: 200px; background: white; border: 1px solid black;"><div style="width: 72%; background: red; font-size: 8px; line-height: 8px;"> </div></div><p style="margin: 10px; border: none; background: white; color: black;">You are always trying to find the time to get back to your book. You are convinced that the world would be a much better place if only everyone read more.</p></td></tr><tr><td style="color: black; background: white; padding: 3px;">Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm</td><td style="background: white; padding: 3px;"><div style="width: 100px; background: white; border: 1px solid black; margin-top: 4px;"><div style="width: 66%; background: red; font-size: 8px; line-height: 8px;"> </div></div></td></tr><tr><td style="color: black; background: white; padding: 3px;">Book Snob</td><td style="background: white; padding: 3px;"><div style="width: 100px; background: white; border: 1px solid black; margin-top: 4px;"><div style="width: 55%; background: red; font-size: 8px; line-height: 8px;"> </div></div></td></tr><tr><td style="color: black; background: white; padding: 3px;">Literate Good Citizen</td><td style="background: white; padding: 3px;"><div style="width: 100px; background: white; border: 1px solid black; margin-top: 4px;"><div style="width: 52%; background: red; font-size: 8px; line-height: 8px;"> </div></div></td></tr><tr><td style="color: black; background: white; padding: 3px;">Fad Reader</td><td style="background: white; padding: 3px;"><div style="width: 100px; background: white; border: 1px solid black; margin-top: 4px;"><div style="width: 6%; background: red; font-size: 8px; line-height: 8px;"> </div></div></td></tr><tr><td style="color: black; background: white; padding: 3px;">Non-Reader</td><td style="background: white; padding: 3px;"><div style="width: 100px; background: white; border: 1px solid black; margin-top: 4px;"><div style="width: 0%; background: red; font-size: 8px; line-height: 8px;"> </div></div></td></tr><tr><td colspan="2" style="text-align: center; padding: 8px;"><a href="http://www.gotoquiz.com/what_kind_of_reader_are_you"><b>What Kind of Reader Are You?</b></a><br><a href="http://www.gotoquiz.com/">Create Your Own Quiz</a></td></tr></table>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>Waking the Dead</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2007/01/waking_the_dead.html" />
<modified>2007-01-11T07:34:45Z</modified>
<issued>2007-01-11T07:33:38Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2007:/purple/11.4071</id>
<created>2007-01-11T07:33:38Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">Yay! It’s back! But despite looking forward to this for ooooh about a year, I still missed the first 8 minutes of the first part on Sunday night. So, can anyone answer, 1) How did Spence come back from the...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Television</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>Yay! It’s back! </p>

<p>But despite looking forward to this for ooooh about a year, I still missed the first 8 minutes of the first part on Sunday night. So, can anyone answer,</p>

<p>1) How did Spence come back from the brink of death so quickly?<br />
2) And where is Felix? Is her job so taxing that she has to be replaced every series, or is she just making enough money from the BT adverts, so that she doesn’t have to whore herself by associating with such a fine TV programme anymore?</p>

<p>I know that these characters and their resulting stories are marginally peripheral and really we’d pay double the licence fee just to stare at Trevor Eve for an hour BUT I do lie my loose ends to be well and truly tied.</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>Today&apos;s Thoughts</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2007/01/todays_thoughts.html" />
<modified>2007-01-07T17:30:53Z</modified>
<issued>2007-01-07T17:17:43Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2007:/purple/11.4066</id>
<created>2007-01-07T17:17:43Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">1) If it is unlucky to still have your Christmas decorations up after twelth night, then is it unlucky for the Co-op to still be using Christmas carrier bags? 2) Can someone else please tell me that they see the...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Who knows?</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>1) If it is unlucky to still have your Christmas decorations up after twelth night, then is it unlucky for the Co-op to still be using Christmas carrier bags?</p>

<p>2) Can someone else please tell me that they see the irony in a packet of disgusting sweets, containing mainly sugar with a hell of a lot of sweetners and e numbers thrown in for extra nutrition, shaped like lots of little sets of teeth and toothbrushes.</p>

<p>3)If Gordon Brown and John Prescot think that Saddam's execution was such a bad thing, then why did they not speak up before the event when they could have done something about it?</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>Recycled Post Alert!</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2007/01/recycled_post_a.html" />
<modified>2007-01-06T10:06:56Z</modified>
<issued>2007-01-06T10:03:23Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2007:/purple/11.4065</id>
<created>2007-01-06T10:03:23Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">I&apos;ve just posted a review of The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold over at Overdue Books. Feel free to pop over and join in the debate....</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Books</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>I've just posted a review of <em>The Lovely Bones</em> by Alice Sebold over at <a href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/books/archives/004064.html">Overdue Books.</a> Feel free to pop over and join in the debate.</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>So remind me, what year is it again?</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2007/01/so_remind_me_wh.html" />
<modified>2007-01-01T09:49:33Z</modified>
<issued>2007-01-01T09:44:48Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2007:/purple/11.4060</id>
<created>2007-01-01T09:44:48Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">Ah well, I have only just got used to writing &apos;2006&apos; on cheques* and now it seems that 2007 has crept up on me. Where did that come from? Just popping in to wish all my ever-suffering readers a happy...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Day to Day</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>Ah well, I have only just got used to writing '2006' on cheques* and now it seems that 2007 has crept up on me. Where did that come from? </p>

<p>Just popping in to wish all my ever-suffering readers a happy new year and I really will post more often in 2007. That is not to mention all the reading at commenting I've been missing out on over at your blogs.  I won't make that a New Year's Resolution because then it would be destined to fail. Take it as my promise to you from a friend to her trusting friend and then maybe I can guilt myself into doing it.</p>

<p>Elsewhere I have also vowed to learn to knit. In the past people have struggled to teach a clumsy left-hander like me and I have been sitting around waiting for a willing left-handed knitter to fall into my lap. Sadly he or she never came (are we really that freaky?) but my prayers were answered by way of <a href="http://learn-to-knit.com/left1.htm">this site</a> and <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/Stitch-Bitch-Handbook-Instructions-Generation/dp/0761128182/sr=8-1/qid=1167644488/ref=sr_1_1/026-2934564-8287637?ie=UTF8&s=books">this book. </a></p>

<p>I am now half way down my first scarf and while it's certainly not perfect, it's a hell of a lot better than I thought it would be, especially as I've only been knitting four days.<br />
Proud pictures to be posted soon, if you are not a knitter be prepared to be very bored.</p>

<p>Which reminds me, I really must update my Flickr account, when was the last time I posted a photo? </p>

<p>No that is NOT a resolution.</p>

<p></p>

<p></p>

<p><br />
*Who actually writes cheques these days? Perhaps that's why. </p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>It&apos;s the weekend; Therefore I blog</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/12/its_the_weekend.html" />
<modified>2006-12-03T11:03:54Z</modified>
<issued>2006-12-03T10:48:53Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.4025</id>
<created>2006-12-03T10:48:53Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain"> I can&apos;t believe I forgot to blog about this until now. Michelle has come up with a great winter reading challenge. I&apos;ll leave it to her to describe. If you are anything like me your stack of purchased to-be-read...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Books</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p><a href='http://www.jimnshelle.net/books/archives/003945.html'><br />
<img src='http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v222/purple-elephant/stackbutton.jpg' width=100 height=100 border=0 alt='Stacks Challenge'> </a></p>

<p>I can't believe I forgot to blog about this until now.</p>

<p><a href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/main/">Michelle</a> has come up with a great winter reading challenge. I'll leave it to her to describe.</p>

<blockquote>If you are anything like me your stack of purchased to-be-read books is teetering over. So for this challenge we would be reading 5 books that we have already purchased, have been meaning to get to, have been sitting on the nightstand and haven't read before. No going out and buying new books. No getting sidetracked by the lure of the holiday bookstore displays. 
The time frame would be Nov. 1st until Jan. 30 and there will be some small, fun prizes awarded to random participants and/or those with clever review posts. There will be one random drawing for a prize to those who submit their list of books in the comment section by Nov. 15th* but feel free to join any time. There will be another random drawing for those who submit five reviews by Jan. 30 for a small gift certificate to Amazon.</blockquote>

<p>For your information here are the five books chosen by me; Order subject to change...</p>

<p>1) <em>Wintering</em> by Kate Moses (Read & <a href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/books/archives/004024.html">Reviewed</a>)<br />
2) <em>The Lost Art of Keeping Secrets</em> by Eva Rice (Read, Review to follow)<br />
3) <em>Wives and Daughters</em> by Elizabeth Gaskell **<br />
4) <em>The Odd Woman </em>by George Gissing<br />
5) <em>The Deadly Space Between</em> by Patricia Duncker</p>

<p>Yup I've already read two of them, but so far have only submitted one review.<em> Wintering</em> is <a href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/books/archives/004024.html">already up</a> and <em>The Lost Art of Keeping Secrets</em> will follow soon. After that there will be a brief break while I catch up with some other reading.</p>

<p>So what are you waiting for? As much as I am rubbish at keeping you informed it is not too late to <a href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/books/archives/003945.html">sign up</a>. Off you go.</p>

<p></p>

<p>*Sorry gang, If you missed that date because of me. *Ducks*</p>

<p>** The token I-Can't-Believe-I've-Not-Read-This entry.  If I had any dignity I would pretend that this was a re-read but I am ashamed to say that I have only read a couple of Gaskell's novels. Oh the shame.</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>D&apos;oh</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/12/doh.html" />
<modified>2006-12-02T19:32:24Z</modified>
<issued>2006-12-02T19:02:08Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.4023</id>
<created>2006-12-02T19:02:08Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">It comes to all parents I suppose, it&apos;s just that I didn&apos;t think it would be so soon, she is only 5 1/2 after all ... The thing is ... I think I just watched Littleone overtake me in the...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Parenting</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>It comes to all parents I suppose, it's just that I didn't think it would be so soon, she is only 5 1/2 after all ...</p>

<p>The thing is ... I think I just watched Littleone overtake me in the intelligence race......</p>

<p>ME;  My goodness, we're going to have to get you a new swimming costume.<br />
HER; Why?<br />
ME; This one is getting too small for you.<br />
HER;  (<i>Falls on the floor laughing</i>)<br />
ME; What's so funny?<br />
HER; (<i>Recovering</i>) What did you say?<br />
ME; I said 'Your swimming costume is getting  too small for you.'<br />
HER; No it's not.<br />
ME I think you'll find it is. <br />
HER; My swimming costume is NOT getting too small for me.<br />
ME; If you don't believe me look at those red marks where it has been digging in to you.<br />
HER; That's because <i>I'm</i> getting too <i>big</i> for my swimming costume. My swimming costume did not get too small for me.</p>

<p><i>Silence.</i></p>

<p>She's right you know.</p>

<p>I think....</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>Linda Perry - James Blunt - What&apos;s Going On?</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/11/linda_perry_jam.html" />
<modified>2006-11-28T22:26:37Z</modified>
<issued>2006-11-28T22:16:17Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.4012</id>
<created>2006-11-28T22:16:17Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">Dear Linda Perry, I cannot even begin to describe how much I loved you once. In my teens you rocked my world, quite literally. I would wait until everybody had gone out and then I would put on that 4...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Who knows?</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>Dear Linda Perry,<br />
	<br />
I cannot even begin to describe how much I loved you once. In my teens you rocked my world, quite literally. I would wait until everybody had gone out and then I would put on that 4 Non Blondes CD and bellow along at the top of my voice. Psst don't tell anyone (Hello there Internet!) but up until a week ago there were occasions when I would still reach for your CD during my precious moments alone because 'What's Up' was still there in the top twenty of my favourite songs of all time, ever.  But like I say, that was a week ago and oh, what a difference a week makes.<br />
	<br />
Now I want to talk about James Blunt. Linda, you probably already know where I'm going with this, the rest of you stay with me and all will be revealed. Until the first time I heard James Blunt, I truly believed that there was good in everyone, all you had to do was search for it. George Bush? Well he's quite cute when he pulls that monkey face and I have to stop myself from wanting to rub his head and throw him a banana. Saddam? All he had to do was grow a beard and look at me with those doe eyes and now I'm convinced that he could not have done all those bad things to those people. He's just a teddy bear really. James Blunt has destroyed my innocence because I try, oh my God do I try (someone please tell me they can see what I'm doing there) to find just one, just one good thing to say about him but the trouble is, the guy has absolutely NO redeeming features whatsoever. Zilch.<br />
	<br />
I could make a list of all the things that are 100% WRONG about the guy but quite frankly you haven't got all night and it's not good for my insomnia to get so worked up before bedtime. I will say however that his biggest crime against humanity is bringing That Song into the world. It is the most tedious, nauseating pile of trite that my ears have ever had the misfortune to hear. Above all that, it should be held up in poetry classes (alongside this blog post no doubt)across the land as the perfect example of how NOT to write.<br />
	<br />
I know many of us, my third year English teacher included, have a problem with the use of the word 'nice', ('Think of the biscuit,' I remember him saying. 'A bit bland and tasteless but alright if you fancy something sweet and you've got nothing else in the house.') but to me the word 'beautiful' is much more of a cop-out - It could apply to the jumper I bought from Save the Children during my lunch break, it could apply to a Pre-Raphaelite painting, it could apply to my cat - but it describes none of them.  It is for this reason that Sonnet no. 130 beats every single one of Shakespeare's plays as the most striking poetry ever written.  His Dark Lady's eyes may indeed be 'nothing like the sun' but by that final couplet we feel that we know her and we too love her more 'than any she belied with false compare.' That woman in the song? Could we pick her out in a crowd on what James Blunt told us about her? Would we care if her train plummeted from the track just after the next stop?<br />
	<br />
Even my five year old daughter has moved beyond the use of the word beautiful. Only a couple of days ago she urged me to look out the window. 'Look at the sky Mummy!' she declared 'It's gone all golden.' You may laugh but I bet the image you have in your head is ten hundred times more clear than that of Miss 'Beautiful' over there on that train. My daughter has also moved on from rhyming 'you' 'true' and 'do' but like I say, I don't have the time to go there.<br />
	<br />
I gather there are some readers who don't understand how we got from Linda Perry to James Blunt. Let me explain. Last week I was told by a reliable source that Linda Perry is responsible for <em>discovering</em> James Blunt. Yes that's right every time you walk into a shop and are subjected to a sound that resembles a man's slow, painful death by testicle strangulation, remember it is Linda Perry who put him there. Now excuse me while I duck so you can all get to her.<br />
	<br />
Oh Linda, Linda, Linda! Gone are my childish illusions that you were ever Taste personified. After 13 years I watch as they are blown away by the wind.<br />
	<br />
I guess I shall be 'trying to get up that great big hill of hope' all by myself from now on.<br />
	<br />
It'll be a lonely ride.</p>

<p>Yours sincerely </p>

<p>Purple Elephant</p>

<p>	<br />
</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>Wanted; A different phobia....</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/11/wanted_a_differ.html" />
<modified>2006-11-15T22:03:45Z</modified>
<issued>2006-11-15T21:57:32Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.3976</id>
<created>2006-11-15T21:57:32Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">Does anyone know where I can get myself a fear of needles? Just about everyone I know has one, I know big hefty men who topple to the ground at the thought of their own blood being sucked from their...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Television</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>Does anyone know where I can get myself a fear of needles? Just about everyone I know has one, I know big hefty men who topple to the ground at the thought of their own blood being sucked from their body. The thing is when I was not too well a couple of months ago I had quite a few blood tests and I tried to be scared I really did. I even watched as the needle pierced my skin, but my heart would not so much as skip a beat. Damned thing.</p>

<p>Now if you have read this far and you have a fear of needles then I really don't want you to think that I am mocking you because this really isn't the case. I'm not writing this post because I think I'm all big and clever and better than you because I'm not. My fear is much more stupid and mundane than yours and the greatest problem is it can pop up at anytime and take me totally by surprise. </p>

<p>You see everyone, I turn a white shade of pallid and start swooning at the mention of anything to do with the digestive tract, particularly anything that might be expelled from either end. Yes indeed if my doctor was right now running towards me with The Biggest Needle in the World Ever, my eye lid would not so much as flicker. If he were to add that the side effects of what he was about to give me were vomiting and diarrhoea, you wouldn't hear the end of his sentence for the sound of the back of my head thudding on the floorboards.</p>

<p>An example. Yesterday afternoon I got home from work and Mr. PE had cooked a grand risotto. It had all my favourite things in it, like olives and mushrooms and there I was tucking into it pretty happily whilst watching the local news. You'd think I'd be safe watching the local news now wouldn't you? But no, on comes a piece about the Winter Vomiting Virus that has hit Bedford hospital really hard, apparently. </p>

<p>And suddenly I find myself feeling all nostalgic about the past. Do you remember the days when we used to get 'tummy bugs' and 'upset tummies'? Even I, with my fear admit that they sound rather cute. 'I'm a little bug that has come to visit your tummy' and 'There there little tummy are you sad?' But Winter Vomiting Virus! Ugh! Just the alliteration in there makes me shudder and then imagine it with a German accent 'Vinter ..... THUD!</p>

<p>Now where was I? <em>Look East</em> The local news. Remember my friends, that I live in East Anglia and nothing ever happens locally. Every item that is even remotely newsworthy has to be dragged out for all its worth so that the local news team have a hope in hell of filling the whole half hour. So we are shown how to wash our hands but I'm not convinced; a blob of Carex may see off the wussy Tummy Bug but I expect the Winter Vomiting Virus probably drinks Carex for breakfast with a double vodka for good measure.</p>

<p>And if only <em>Look East</em> could stop there but no, they had a news story and it was still only 6.45. How could they fill the time? Wait ... Wait ... Here it comes, drum roll please....</p>

<p>'So,' says the reporter. 'What are the symptoms of Winter Vomiting Virus?'</p>

<p>I really really wish I was making this up but alas I kid you not, he spoke those exact words. And then to taunt me the screen went red and in big white bullet points appeared across the screen; the symptoms of Winter Vomiting Virus. 1-2-3 there they were and no, I'm not going to repeat them. Work it out for yourselves.</p>

<p>After that the room went black, and my risotto, my lovely lovely  risotto, went cold.</p>

<p><br />
</p>]]>

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</entry>
<entry>
<title>My first blog post in over a week and I&apos;m already asking a favour...</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/11/my_first_blog_p.html" />
<modified>2006-11-09T22:15:22Z</modified>
<issued>2006-11-09T22:08:17Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.3963</id>
<created>2006-11-09T22:08:17Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">Has anyone got any tips for getting biro ink out of denim. My pen leaked in the pocket of my favourite jeans. I wouldn&apos;t mind but I&apos;d only worn them once. The thing is I&apos;m super fussy about the fit...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Who knows?</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>Has anyone got any tips for getting biro ink out of denim. My pen leaked in the pocket of my favourite jeans. </p>

<p>I wouldn't mind but I'd only worn them once. The thing is I'm super fussy about the fit of trousers and I loathe shopping for jeans in particular because it takes me ages to find a pair I really like. I stumbled across this pair in a charity shop last Saturday and *sob* I'm not likely to find them ever again. So do your best for me guys...</p>

<p>Tune in again tomorrow for advice on how to fix a broken nail....</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>So much for that extra hour in bed....</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/10/so_much_for_tha.html" />
<modified>2006-10-29T09:03:21Z</modified>
<issued>2006-10-29T08:55:21Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.3941</id>
<created>2006-10-29T08:55:21Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">Ok so who, despite being reminded by Darren Jordan on the Ten o&apos; Clock News last night, still forgot to do the clocks and so got up a whole hour early and then didn&apos;t realise that they had done so...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Day to Day</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>Ok so who, despite being reminded by Darren Jordan on the Ten o' Clock News last night, still forgot to do the clocks and so got up a whole hour early and then didn't realise that they had done so until an hour later when it was time to get up anyway.</p>

<p>No me neither.<br />
</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>Bounce!</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/10/bounce.html" />
<modified>2006-10-25T21:00:17Z</modified>
<issued>2006-10-25T20:55:07Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.3930</id>
<created>2006-10-25T20:55:07Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">A sure sign of adulthood is that you no longer &apos;fall over&apos; (as kids do) but instead you &apos;have a fall&apos;. &apos;Having a fall&apos; sounds so graceful doesn&apos;t it? Like something old ladies do when their legs finally give up...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Day to Day</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>A sure sign of adulthood is that you no longer 'fall over' (as kids do) but instead you 'have a fall'.</p>

<p>'Having a fall' sounds so graceful doesn't it? Like something old ladies do when their legs finally give up on them and they wither softly to the ground like a drifting leaf. There is absolutely nothing about my piece de resistance yesterday that could be described as graceful. It was as if that loose paving slab projectile vomited me over the pavement as I and my shopping were spewed over the entire estate. Oh and if only that had been the end of it, but no sooner had I hit the concrete when there I was flying through the air again. </p>

<p>I thought at this point that maybe I had died (of embarrassment, no less) and I was being heaved back up to heaven to meet my maker, but alas no such luck, I was simply bouncing across the pavement on my right hip and shoulder. Bump bump bump.</p>

<p>To add salt to my wounds the kafuffle provided the night's entertainment for the local Tesco's Express Hoodie Gang, who all instantly collapsed in laughter (give them their due it probably <em>was</em> funny) which left only a sole young man with a walking stick to hobble over and offer his assistance. The thought of what sort of tragi-comic slapstick might occur should I have taken the man's only spare hand  to help me to my feet was enough to force me to silently vow that even if I had broken every bone in my body, I was going to yank myself off the floor, insist that I was OK and drag myself home before I collapsing again.</p>

<p>'I'm fine!' I declared to anybody who cared, 'I think my coffee took the brunt' and true to my word, the jar was shattered into pieces smaller than my pride.</p>

<p>The thing is that paving slab has been loose for months now and every time we walk past it, I always shout out to warn my daughter, 'Mind the loose slab!' NOT ONCE has she ever tripped over it. Last night because I was on my way home from work, she was not with me, it was dark and the rest (or should I say my dignity) is history.</p>

<p>Quite how I got away with not breaking any bones, I shall never know - my wrist, hip and knee are quite the most revolting colour I've ever seen and I had to fish a bit of coffee jar from a wound in my hand, but thankfully with the aid of a little facial grimace, everything seems to work satisfactorily.  </p>

<p>Though I am mourning the loss of a WHOLE JAR of coffee. That does seem a little unfair.</p>]]>

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</entry>
<entry>
<title>Jane Eyre</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/10/jane_eyre.html" />
<modified>2006-10-23T22:49:11Z</modified>
<issued>2006-10-23T22:43:15Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.3928</id>
<created>2006-10-23T22:43:15Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">At Overdue Books Michelle has been pondering how to review Jane Eyre and what with the new BBC dramatisation, and the fact that I can waffle about Jane Eyre to my heart&apos;s content (ah! my heart) I thought I&apos;d put...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Books</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>At <a href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/books/">Overdue Books</a> Michelle has been pondering how to review <em>Jane Eyre</em> and what with the new BBC dramatisation, and the fact that I can waffle about <em>Jane Eyre</em> to my heart's content (ah! my heart) I thought I'd put in my ha'penny's worth over here.</p>

<p>My first encounter with <em>Jane Eyre</em> was with yet another TV series, the one with Timothy Dalton. I sat and watched it with my mum and then asked for the book. She bought me the Ladybird heavily-abridged-for-kids and devoid-of-passion version which I read and then asked if I might not borrow that nice hefty old-fashioned blue hardback on my mum's bookshelf.</p>

<p>'Oooh it might be a bit heavy for you...' my mum suggested but I demonstrated that I could lift it perfectly well and she didn't have the heart to explain that it wasn't quite what she meant.</p>

<p>I read it one half term for a sponsored read-athon where the emphasis was supposed to be on quantity rather than quality, needless to say I never made it to book number two on the list but everyone was so impressed that I'd read Jane Eyre that they gave me lots of money anyway.</p>

<p>I'm not sure how much of it I understood, but I admired Jane's sprit, her courage and her determination, was disturbed by the animal woman in the attic who made Mr Rochester go blind (what was she doing there?) but most of all I was of course in love with Rochester and dreamed that one day I too would marry his dark, brooding modern day equivalent.</p>

<p>After that I was presented with <em>Little Women</em> and <em>Lorna Doone</em> and I never looked back. My <em>Famous Fives</em> were banished to the loft for evermore.</p>

<p>And with each reading it held something new for me. In my early teens I learned whole passages off by heart. For instance;</p>

<blockquote>'I tell you I must go!' I retorted, roused to something like passion. 
'Do you think I can stay to become nothing to you? Do you think I am an automation? - a machine without feelings? and can bear to have my morsel of bread snatched from my lips, and my drop of living water dashed from my cup? Do you think, because I am poor, obscure, plain and little, I am soulless and heartless? - you think wrong! - I have as much soul as you, - and full as much heart! And if God had gifted me with some beauty, and much wealth, I should have made it as hard for you to leave me, as it is now for me to leave you. I am not talking to you now through the medium of custom, conventionalities, nor even of mortal flesh: - it is my spirit that addresses your spirit; just as if both had passed through the grave, and we stood at God's feet, equal as we are!'</blockquote>

<p>And then as I got older it began to make me feel just a little uneasy, that woman in the attic again, who had to die so we could have that happy ending. Oh and while we are on the subject of that happy ending, as much as I sigh every time I read the words 'Reader, I married him', wouldn't it really have been so much better if she had started that girls' school after all?</p>

<p>But there is so much more to <em>Jane Eyre</em> than romance. Let us not forget Jane's rant on the battlement about the lot of women; let us not forget her refusal to be dressed up and jewelled like the odious Blanche Ingram; not to mention her rebellion in the Red Room I am barely scratching the surface.</p>

<p>So here I am, having come full circle again, watching yet another BBC adaptation of <em>Jane Eyre</em>, which wasn't at all bad really. I cannot deny that Ruth Wilson's awkward gawkiness was perfect for Jane and I was faintly impressed with the way in which Toby Stephens played up Rochester's humorous side, even if I felt that this was a little overdone at times. I could even see what they were doing with that erotic 'beating of the flames' scene. That was very clever and arty and stuff.</p>

<p>You see, Michelle was right, it is immensely difficult to write a review of Jane Eyre. I know that when I tried to write an essay on the novel I ended up with one of the lowest marks of my degree, I think because I cannot detach myself from my own emotional response to the work.</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>
<entry>
<title>That&apos;ll teach me for having no faith in myself...</title>
<link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/archives/2006/10/thatll_teach_me.html" />
<modified>2006-10-11T11:01:47Z</modified>
<issued>2006-10-11T09:59:41Z</issued>
<id>tag:www.jimnshelle.net,2006:/purple/11.3893</id>
<created>2006-10-11T09:59:41Z</created>
<summary type="text/plain">So I had this really crappy day. It had been a week since my interview with the Library and I&apos;d heard nothing, so I spent the morning traipsing round the town in the pouring rain, dropping off CVs in places...</summary>
<author>
<name>purple elephant</name>
<url>http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/</url>
<email>purpleelephant@fsmail.com</email>
</author>
<dc:subject>Day to Day</dc:subject>
<content type="text/html" mode="escaped" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.jimnshelle.net/purple/">
<![CDATA[<p>So I had this really crappy day. It had been a week since my interview with the Library and I'd heard nothing, so I spent the morning traipsing round the town in the pouring rain, dropping off CVs in places I really didn't want to work. I then spent the afternoon in the Job Centre filling out form after tedious form. I got home just in time to drop the shopping on the kitchen floor, neck a glass of water and head straight back out the door to collect the Littleone from school.</p>

<p>It wasn't until I got back home again that I bothered to check the answer phone...</p>

<p>Time of message; 10.55.... at that time I was only just at the bus stop 50 yards from my front door.</p>

<p>To cut a long story short. As from Monday I will be working full time at Cambridge University Library.</p>

<p>I then went to see Seth Lakeman to celebrate.... Review to follow...</p>]]>

</content>
</entry>

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