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June 30, 2005
Question;
What do you get if you mix the 19th century novel and a couple of episodes of Neighbours with a Grandparent from the East End of London*?
Answer; Me, apparrently.
Via; Feminsite
Your Slanguage Profile |
| Victorian Slang: 75% |
| Aussie Slang: 50% |
| British Slang: 50% |
| Canadian Slang: 50% |
| Prison Slang: 50% |
| Southern Slang: 25% |
| New England Slang: 0% |
* Although I have never been to Canada and I don't know where the prision bit came from. Honest Miss.
Posted by purple elephant at 01:28 PM |
June 29, 2005
Who did it then?
They are trying to shake our will in Iraq - just as they tried to shake our will on 11 September 2001.
Oh my heavenly days! So it was those nasty Iraqis that 'did it' then was it?
I wish you'd said. It's just that I thought it was that other bloke, you know the one with a beard, Bin Laden, that's it. Didn't we kill all those people in Afghanistan looking for him?
Now I'm confused.
Posted by purple elephant at 07:38 PM |
Surveys
I've done it and I know Kate has are you going to do it too?!
Posted by purple elephant at 04:59 PM |
June 28, 2005
Big Brother
I must confess I watched Big Brother last night. I know, I know there is nothing I like less than being forced to watch self obsessed, loudmouth, layabouts bickering about the most mind numbingly boring trivialities. But it was on between Richard and Judy and the Simpsons. I was also writing an essay (or rather I was rearranging the five words I had taken me all day to write) and decided these people really weren’t worth the time and effort in searching for the remote.
Then the following conversation oozed from the speakers.
Voice1‘Question: When did the Second World War start?’
Voice2 ‘I think it was 1966’
Voice3 ‘Nah. Wasn’t that the World Cup or something?’
Now this conversation got me thinking (not about when the war started. Don’t even go there) about these so-called ‘reality TV’ shows.
What I want to know is this. Are these real people? In other words are we on average really this thick or did they search around goddamn hard to find them? There is of course the possibility that Channel Four pay big bucks for them to act like this. Either of the above options disturbs me because presumably Channel Four have done their research and discovered that these are the sort of people that make good TV ie this is what Joe Public wants to watch.
Why does Joe Public want to watch these people? I can only think of two reasons; firstly that he can relate to them in some way, that he actually likes them.. Are these the qualities we have dragged our children up to admire in human beings? This brings us back to question one, maybe Joe Public is just as stupid as the Big Brother contestants
Secondly, and this is the most disturbing thought of all, perhaps Joe Public likes watching Big Brother because he finds these people so distant from himself that he can laugh at them and thank his lucky stars that he was credited with at least one grain of intelligence.
What worries me about this final option is that if this is the case then Big Brother is some sort of 21st Century Freak Show. These days we all cringe at the thought of John Merrick's defomities being held up for entertainment but is this any different? Have we dragged some poor unsuspecting youngsters with some sort of brain deficiency (stop it I'm trying to be serious here)and taken advantage of their desperation to ‘make it’ just so we can sit back on our smug backsides and mock their misfortune?
Either way I don’t think this sort of thing should be on our screens. Well not before the watershed at least.
Posted by purple elephant at 07:31 PM |
June 26, 2005
Not on a Sunday...
I can't believe that Jo Whiley got just got away with the expression 'stark bollock naked' at 6:15 on a Sunday afternoon on BBC2.
Not that I'm complaining. I'm pleased to see that there exists another fan of the most beautiful word in the English language.
Posted by purple elephant at 06:35 PM |
June 25, 2005
Happy Birthday Littleone
My Baby is 4 Today.
Where did all that time go?
To mark the occasion I’ve posted a gratuitous pic from when she was a few days old. You will find it in the extended entry so those who are sick of staring at other people’s babies can easily pass it by. That nappy is the smallest size over at Bambino Mio and the vest was newborn size.
How did she get so big?
And I feel really bad as I have got so much work to do that today is not going to be very exciting for her. Curse myself for not getting organised enough to get this done on time. Will try and take her out this afternoon if the weather improves.
Mind you she seems perfectly happy right now watching Finding Nemo and playing with her new train set and art box.
4 years ago;
Latest;
Posted by purple elephant at 11:19 AM |
June 24, 2005
Glastonwhat?
I can’t believe Mr PE is watching the Glastonbury coverage on the BBC. This is where we are very different. I’m doing the denial thing I’m very good at denial you see, it gets me through but even I find denial rather difficult when there is a TV 8ft away from my face, reminding me how good Elvis Costello was tonight.
I’m trying to write an essay, I am actually further behind than I was on my last one, I got away with it then but surely I can’t keep being lucky. I wonder how denial would work on this one. Essay? What essay?
They were speaking to some festival goers on the radio (again, something I wouldn’t have been listening to) and there was one dappy woman whinging ‘Oh my God it was a heatwave when we got here and now look at it. The weather forecast didn’t let us know (er I don’t know which one you adhere to but the BBC has been predicting this for nearly a week) and I left my wellies at home blah blah blah.’
No wait a minute, let me get this right. You didn’t take your wellies to Glastonbury? Then you only have yourself to blame honey.
Then they went to a couple of lads and all they said was ‘We are just looking for a rubber dingy.’
Ah! Now there’s the spirit! It’s attitudes and people like that that make Glastonbury what it is. I hope they found what they were looking for and my heart is with them now in that mud, sailing down the hill from the Sacred Space.
Here’s to the dingy guys!
Posted by purple elephant at 10:14 PM |
Just your average Glastonbury really...
Flooding causes Glastonbury chaos
Stages closed down. Everywhere flooded. Just heard on the radio that people are starting to leave.
What a bunch of lightweights!
Posted by purple elephant at 12:07 PM |
June 23, 2005
Purple Elephant's Vegan Summer Fruit Shortcake
As promised;
Adapted from this.
3 cups flour
1/3 cup sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt
1/3 cup margarine
1 1/2 cups plain soya yogurt
1/3 cup orange juice
1/2 tsp vanilla essence.
A packet of vegan custard (or if you are not a cheat like me make it yourself nice and thick and allow it to cool) I use the Provamel stuff.
Strawberries, raspberries whatever you want to put on top.
In a bowl, place flour, sugar, baking powder and salt, and stir well to combine.
Cut in the marg until the mixture resembles coarse breadcrumbs.
In a small bowl stir the remaining ingredients together.(Except the custard and the fruit of course!)
Add the wet ingredients to the dry ingredients and stir well to combine.
Grease two Victoria sandwich cake tins and squidge the mixture into each.
Shove in oven for about 20 mins on gas mark 6 until they are nicely browned.
When they are done get them out of the tin and allow to cool.
Now for the fun bit: (and I must admit I waited until the picnic to do this bit)
Slap the two cakes together with a generous squidge of custard in the middle. Then splodge a load of custard on the top and decorate with your fruit.
Serve chilled with even more custard and some vegan cream (I use Provamel Soya Dream and no they are not paying me to say all this but if they are offering?..)
Posted by purple elephant at 10:17 PM |
June 22, 2005
Greetings from Glastonbury!!!!!!
Spent the night in Glastonbury town, just got the bus to the festival site and am waiting in the queue at the gates right now. Think we will pitch our tent near the Green Fields and then go and grab some food. Can you see the weather? Isn’t it great?! Think it’s going to be a good one this year. I can tell!
Did I fool you?
Nah, didn’t manage to fool myself either. Damn it.
Sunrise was at 4:37 yesterday, got up about 3:30 (turned out to be about 1 ½ hours sleep. Why did I bother?) so I could see the whole thing, watched the sky turn blue and then Littleone fell out of bed at precisely 4:35 and I spent the next 15 minutes comforting her. So I kind of saw it but as I say Arbury is not exactly Stonehenge or Glastonbury Tor. Can’t help thinking that Mr. PE had the right idea in deciding to stay in bed. Especially as I only got a bit of writing done but not as much as I hoped, I was too tired and every time I sat down at the computer I nearly dozed off. I also had terrible hayfever (does anyone else get it worse when they are tired?) and could hardly see.
Picnic was nice, we waited until tea time and sat at the Mill Pond just the other side of the Granta. We tucked into homemade bread and hummous, veggie sausage rolls and summer fruit shortcake (stay tuned for recipes) all washed down with elderflower cordial. Oh and we fed some gorgeous goslings and cygnets I went particularly broody over them, I’ve decided I don’t want babies anymore, I want goslings. (Photos to follow too)
We stopped off at the Fort St George and met up with some friends for a swift half before coming home and falling asleep on the sofa.
Oh and as for my anniversary present. I got this and this. Don’t I just get the best pressies?!
Posted by purple elephant at 12:34 PM |
June 20, 2005
Midsummer’s Eve
*Sigh* This time last year we were camped out in Glastonbury town cooking our dinner and preparing to head up the tor for the solstice celebrations. Watching the summer solstice sun rise on Glastonbury tor is something that everyone that way inclined should try at least once in their life. The previous two years we did Stonehenge, which is indeed a experience not to be missed, if a little over crowded for my liking. Then of course a couple of days later it was on to the festival. Oh God the festival! Did I mention that we couldn’t get tickets and how – like- totally gutted I am? *Sob*
Tomorrow has an extra special significance for us you see because it is our wedding anniversary and also the anniversary of the day we first set eyes on each other. So as of tomorrow we have been married three years and together for five. Bless our little cotton/polyester mix socks. Eh?
So what are we doing this year? We are actually thinking of going to bed tonight (No! Hear me out!) and getting up in time to watch the sun rise over Cambridge. I doubt very much if there are any ley lines or ancient significance directly linked to the Arbury estate (but then again who knows?) but one good thing about living here is that we get the sun rise out the back and sun set out the front and being three floors up coupled with East Anglia’s low laying ground means we get a reasonably good view from up here. We also thought it would be a nice idea to wake with the sun and stay with it all day rather than stay awake and then fall into bed as soon as it rises.
Weather permitting I also have a nice picnic planned for the afternoon. If it works out OK I will share some of the recipes with you at a later date.
Finally, it only occurred to me yesterday that my novel takes place over one sultry day which just happens to be Midsummer’s day (yes I know that you could argue about it being later in the week but we celebrate Midsummer today and tomorrow, at err well Midsummer, rather than St John’s day) So I thought what better day to have a marathon writing session than on the actual day in which the novel is set? I can’t pass up the opportunity of writing about the sun rise as the sun rises, and you never know if some magic comes by the way of my characters then it might get to me too and help me over the can’t-get-past-the-first-four-chapters barrier. You never know until you try.
BUT (and there is a big but) I have told myself that I can’t spend all day on my novel unless I get a SIGNIFICANT amount of study done. In theory I need to cover Friday, Saturday, Sunday and today as well as tomorrow, which would be a whooping 10 hours work. Realistically I have told myself that I just have to read, type and think doubly fast and then I can get away with five. Two down, three more to go.
So tonight cooking for the picnic and study, study, study. Just don’t mention the G word.
A happy solstice to you all and as a friend of ours said to us today, ‘See you on the dark side of the year.’
Posted by purple elephant at 07:32 PM |
Scorched!
This is a super quick summary of our weekend. Got a busy couple of days and if I don’t do it now it will get pushed aside by our solstice celebrations.
Anyone who was anywhere in the UK this weekend will understand that I am eternally thankful that the main stage was in a darkened air conditioned hall. It was a great place to be around the midday point I can tell you! Also someone had the bright idea of holding most of the kids’ events indoors too. Genius every last one of them.
Musical highlights included Justin Sullivan’s (New Model Army) acoustic set, but then I have never seen Justin or NMA do a set that is anything less than immensely enjoyable. I did however come as close to hating him as I’ll ever be when he bellowed ‘See you at Glastonbury next weekend!’
Yes THANK YOU Justin. Thank you very much! *Snarl*
(Watch this space over the next week for continual brow furrowing about how it’s just not fair that I’m not going to Glastonbury. Be very prepared.)
Disappointment of the weekend was that Mark Chadwick (Levellers) and Rev Hammer’s set clashed with Eddi Reader’s. After much pained decision making I watched Mark and Rev and then legged it over to catch the last 2 ½ songs of Eddi Reader. (Note to self; Buy myself Eddi Reader’s Robert Burns CD as a consolation prize)
Bad idea of the weekend was Mr PE’s decision to pitch the tent directly behind the burger and bacon stall but then it was right next to the coffee stall so I guess that convenience does make up for the meaty aroma that wafted though the tent 24 hours a day.
Talking of food if you ever go anywhere and there is a veggie food stall called ‘Leon’s’ you absolutely MUST try a plate of his scrumptious food. I loved the stuff so much that I actually treated myself to his cookbook so I can eat that stuff all year round. I even got it signed (he offered I didn’t ask, so wipe that smirk off your face!) Littleone spent a chunk of the weekend playing with his little girl.
Oh and everyone had literally emptied the bar dry by about 11:pm Saturday night. I guess this means that a great festival was had by all. (Although I am the wise one who steered well clear of what Jenn calls the Bad Mamma juice. Soaring heat, alcohol and parenting duties – not the best combination in the world)
Posted by purple elephant at 09:43 AM |
June 17, 2005
Photos
I'm sure everyone knows how hard it is to get a half decent photo of the whole family together unless you go professional or something. Well here we are, I'm never entirely happy with photos of myself and none of us are actually looking at the camera but I do like the atmosphere captured by this pic, especially with the buttercups and the dog in the background.
It was taken at the wedding we went to a few months back. Do you remember the shirt I made? If you search around at this site you will probably find some pics of the finished job. Try this one of the happy couple.
Oh and don't you just want to know what the joke is in this one? (Mr. PE on the far left.) Second thoughts I know their sense of humour it's probably not a good idea.
We are off here for the weekend. Will be back Sunday evening. See you then.
Posted by purple elephant at 07:33 AM |
June 16, 2005
Pledge Bank
Just stumbled across this great site called Pledge Bank (via Pewari)The idea is to gather together like minded people who would like to change a little bit of their world but need help to do so. If you head on over there you will find a whole list of pledges set by people like you and me. You are bound to find one you are prepared to sign up to, if not pledge one yourself.
I signed up to do a litter pick of the beck from Brookfields down Burnside to Cherry Hinton Hall, Cambridge. Its only me on that one for the moment. Where are all you Cambridgers?
Also I will stop using plastic carrier bags at the supermarket, and use reusable cloth bags instead I have to admit I do try to do this but usually end up forgetting to take bags with me. No excuses now!
Pewari is going to have 10 trees planted to offset her total carbon dioxide emissions for 2005.
What are you going to do?
Posted by purple elephant at 02:45 PM |
June 15, 2005
Talent
I’ve been thinking about the craft of writing but I suppose you could apply the discussion to most activities. I wonder if there is such thing as ‘talent’ or is the whole thing down to hard work or even luck? I guess it would help if we could clarify what we mean when we refer ‘good writing’ As a reader I adore elaborate poetic prose and pages of interior monologue and value deep characterisation over plot but I’m aware that most readers find this sort of style dull, slow and heavy going. Who am I to say that Thomas Hardy (for example) is more talented than the writer of the racy thriller that you might be reading at the moment? If it is all so subjective then can we define talent? And if it can’t be defined then does it exist?
I think that there must be something that makes certain activities easier for some people. We all know irritating people who seem to be able to do things with very little effort. (Yes Hello Mr. PE) while the rest of us think, plan, write, delete, write, cut, paste and then give up. I wonder if this is what we mean by talent? Those who find it all so easy. Does this mean that the rest of us are not talented? Or if in the end we produce a piece of work that others enjoy reading, however hard we may have worked on it, can we call it talent and be done with it?
There is an expression that many people throw around in discussions like this and that is that ‘you can do anything if you set your mind to it.’ I always find this slightly insulting as it implies that if you have been dealt a hard blow in your life, it is somehow your own fault. (Hey you homeless person. You too could have a sixteen bedroom mansion if you set your mind to it!) Bringing it back on subject I’m sure that even if I trained every day I would still never make the Olympic 100 metres final. Yet although I wouldn’t call myself a ‘good writer’ at this moment in time, I do feel that if I got the opportunity to write massive amounts everyday I would certainly make more progress than if I were to jog for the same amount of time. If this is the case then is talent comparative? Can I say that I am ‘more talented’ at writing than I am at running even though I don’t believe that I have got a ‘talent’ for writing?
Confused? I do apologise for the ream of questions. Someone give me the answers quick. I’ve been pondering it for days and it is beginning to bother me. I guess it’s not as if it’s something you can prove anyway.
Posted by purple elephant at 08:26 PM |
June 14, 2005
You just don't understand us..
Via Kate. Who does all the best quiz things;
| You Are a Retrospective Soul |
Great moments of insight and sensitivity come to you easily. Souls you are most compatible with: Traveler Soul and Prophet Soul |
Posted by purple elephant at 06:43 PM |
June 13, 2005
From All Consuming to Laundry Baskets; taking in Nature and Michael Jackson along the way.
(There is a linking thread in this post somewhere, I’m just too exhausted to draw it out.)
However hard I tried I couldn’t get All Consuming to accept that I had read anything since The Earth and Middlemarch (and boy does that seem like ages ago) Or rather it acknowledges Life isn’t all Ha Ha Hee Hee and The Woman in White here but will not transfer the info to my sidebar. So have disabled it for the time being and will be updating my sidebar all on my own. (Now watch it crash!)
Have been inspired by Springwatch to do something with the balcony. The BBC have a great site called Breathing Space where you can tap in the size of your space (balcony, yard, small garden etc) and how much time you have to spend, and it then comes up with all sorts of ideas to get you started. Glad to see that we already do at least one of the suggestions (bird feeder stuck to the window) and in the summer my Mum usually gives us a tomato plant and a few pots of herbs. This year I’m thinking window box and bird bath.
I came home from the Car Boot Sale at the weekend with My First Nature Book, so you never know I might even get some help. (I also treated myself to the most wonderful laundry basket in the world ever, it is so great that I almost dedicated a whole post to my new laundry basket but then thought better of it)
Whilst writing this I have learned that Michael Jackson is NOT guilty after all. I actually have no idea what he does (or doesn’t) do to children in his spare time but I sure as hell know that the Man makes my face hurt every time I look at him.
Posted by purple elephant at 10:50 PM |
June 12, 2005
HEALTH!!! LOVE!!! HAPPINESS!!! Bidding starts at 99p!
It seems you can only feel the Goddess within if you've got the money.
God(dess)dammit that's where I've been going wrong!
Go on Bid! See how many poor desperate souls you can kick out the way in the process!
Here at Purple Elephant's Corner I give love away for free. At precisely...err... whenever I remember I will light a candle and send some love in the direction of all my readers. Hell I'll even don my purple dress.
Don't ever say I don't spoil you.
Posted by purple elephant at 11:27 AM |
June 11, 2005
Preschool of Rock
We went to see Attila the Stockbroker last night. Then went on to have a heavy day today listening to lectures at a day school for my course so am a bit worded out and don't have the mental energy to write about anything at length.
I will however provide you with a link to be getting on with. This is for any of you who, like me, are sent over the edge whenever you are forced to listen to inane kiddy music for more than … ooh shall we say … half a second.
So I am pleased to see that St Etienne agree with me and are in the process of recording an album for kids. Yay! Anything to not be tortured by the talentless Hi 5 or the irritating Wiggles ever again.
Posted by purple elephant at 10:12 PM |
June 10, 2005
So near yet so far…
My Mum was telling me about a friend of hers who had some relatives staying with her. Then Littleone buts in,
Littleone; Are they still there?
Mum: Who?
L: The children.
M: No. They have gone home now.
L: Where do they live?
M: In a patronising you-wont-understand voice. Oooooh a long way away.
L: Do they live in Australia?
M: In same voice. No they live in a country called Canada. It's....
L: Oh yes. I know. We went there once for some apple juice.
It took me a while but I did eventually work out that she was thinking of Camden.*
*For those who don't know. Camden is in fact in North London probably about 50 miles from here, I guess it's distance is just a matter of perspective. And no we didn't go there *just* for apple juice.
Posted by purple elephant at 03:11 PM |
June 09, 2005
Thank God for that!
Have been without a computer for a whole week. It crashed last Friday and has only just been fixed. I'd love to be able to say that as a family it did us some good. That we all sat around our dining room table growing beards (oh wait Mr. PE had one of those anyway) whilst eating organic lentils and wholegrain rice having deep conversations about life, the universe and everything.
But no. It was shite and I never want to be forced to endure such torture ever again.
Anyway my absence has had me pondering the following questions;
1) How did we waste spend our time before the internet?
2) How did we write before cut, paste and more importantly, delete?
3) Is my handwriting really *that* bad or are my faculties for reading handwriting out of practice?
Right I'm off to delete bagloads of email spam so that my mailbox is no longer full and then I'm going to catch up on some blogs..
Posted by purple elephant at 12:58 PM |
June 02, 2005
Bree is innocent!
Well we can forget Meera Syal, I’ve nearly finished Life isn’t Ha Ha Hee Hee (why will All Consuming not accept anything I’ve read over the past month?) and I fickly need another person to fall in love with pretty damn soon.
I think I have found her, except I’m not sure who I love the most Bree Van De Kamp or Marcia Cross, you have to understand in these crushes it is sometimes hard to separate character and actor. Coming to think of it I sure as hell could do with a Bree to sort out my house right now.
She was given all the best lines, including my favourite of the whole series ‘Oh Rex! Please don’t mistake my anal retentiveness for actual affection.’ (Although this would be very closely followed by Gabby’s ‘I feel a wave of morning sickness coming on and I want to be on your mother’s grave when it hits.’) Such sarcasm would be easy to over-act but Marcia Cross went with the flow, confident that the lines would carry themselves.
Yet you could always tell that there was a sadness behind that painted on smile, and each time she had to do one of those wistful looks into the distance (which incidentally I hate when this device is over used in TV. I feel I’m being shouted at HEY YOU! This character is SAD, yes SAD. Did you get that?) but again she does it with such subtlety that she broke my heart every last time.
So as you can imagine, that scene last night with the silver. I kind of saw it coming but it got me all the same. Until the camera scanned out and then hit upon the wedding photo. Bree mechanically finishing off the cutlery before breaking down at the edge of the table was enough for me without the naffness of having to see her wedding photo but maybe that’s just me.
But wait Rex died thinking she poisoned him. Whoah! There’s material for a whole new series in here somewhere.
More to the point, what the hell am I going to do with my Wednesday evenings until January?
Posted by purple elephant at 03:32 PM |
June 01, 2005
Home Sweet Home
Thank God for that! I was beginning to have computer withdrawal symptoms. Being offline for a few days meant that my email and my blog have been spammed to buggery and back. Not only that but I have been hit by the writing bug and have got used to doing a bit every day but haven’t had the opportunity for a while which means that I’m bursting at the seams. It has obviously not been good for me as I have had this incessant narrative voice in my head, even my dreams have had a narrator telling me what is going on.. It has been driving me up the wall..
Have had a really busy few days and my feet have not touched the ground, I am totally shattered, just want to fall into bed.
So all in all, nothing interesting to say except I wish I was in Hay right now.
Posted by purple elephant at 08:39 PM |