It was strange walking into the house this morning, being greeted by the homeowner with a handshake, a congratulations and a speech he had promised his wife he would make. They were happy, comforted by the idea that they were selling the house to someone who would make it a home. They invited us in whenever we want between now and closing to measure and plan. They're excited by the improvements we are making and a little sentimental about leaving.

I know that's what makes me love the house, the idea that it's a home, the feeling that it's been a home for generations, that holidays and everydays have happened there and linger there.

We played a game the other night. We played, "What's your favorite part of the new house?" We are easing the boys into new places, spaces, routines. C talked of the yard and the new playroom. J thought and said he liked that his room faced the yard and was close to mine. He liked the fireplace. I tried. I really tried to pick what I liked about the house, the one thing that I loved the most, but I couldn't. It's not a thing or a room. It's not the view or the gardens. It's a feeling.

This morning when we were there I was thinking of Saturday pancakes and Sunday dinners, of Christmas mornings and rainy school days. I ran my hands along the mantel and pictured stockings hanging and greens draped along the top. I know we won't be there for the holidays this year but we will own it and there will be many holidays to come spent in front of the fire.

I paced the hallways and stared from the windows over the kitchen sink. I felt the warmth of the radiators on a chilly, rainy fall morning. I listened to the creak of the steps as I went upstairs to check on the rooms.

I met a man who grew up in that house. His parents built the house in 1922. He and his two brothers lived there. It's a family house. It's a house where boys can grow up and run and laugh. It's a house with history.

I am going to miss our old house. We put a lot of our heart into this house and we made it special. We've been here nearly 10 years and it was our first real grown-up purchase. But we've always known that this was a starter house.

The new house is the kind of house that you can stay in, that family can share with you, that turkey dinners and birthdays are celebrated in. It just feels like home, not our home just yet, but home. And soon we'll be able to walk through the halls without feeling like guests, we'll know each creak and floorboard. We'll start something new.