Sometimes when I get in a bit of a funk and I feel like I have absolutely no direction, I know that it is time for a little time out.
The problem is, of course, that between the crazy ass voices in my head and the crazy ass children in my house, meditation can be a stressful proposition.

Here's how it goes:

Quiet introspective voice: You should really take some time for yourself so that you can feel more grounded and less stressed.

Bitchy voice: What are you on crack? Where the hell would you even sit in this hellhole of a house? Are you just going to sit on the laundry or stack the piles higher?

Quiet introspective voice: Nothing is going to get done if you don't start feeling less out of control.

Crazyass kid #1: MmOOOoooommmmm! He's poking the dog!

Crazyass kid #2: No I am not. He's tattling! MmmmmmmoOOOOOOOOooooommmm!

Bitchy Voice: Oh yeah, this is going to go well. No wonder you never get shit done around here.

QIV: Just take a deep breath, have a little patience, explain to the kids you need a few minutes.

Bitchy Voice: BWahahahahahahahaha! Go get a damn glass of wine, order a pizza and deal with the fact that tonight, like many other nights, is a wash.

End result? Mike's Hard Lemonade and the ballgame is as close to quiet meditation as we're getting here tonight. Got the monsters all set with some water guns which should buy me about 30 minutes until they come in stomping and screeching. Ah summer, isn't it fun?