j's teacher: (in unbelievably perky voice) hi! this is j's teacher. just wanted to let you know that there's no school because of the snow.
me: (pretending to be awake) gruaodifjdjhafshd....ummm....k. thanks for calling.
j's teacher: and just a reminder that j has off next week for winter break.
me: ....................
j's teacher: hope you guys have a fun week off!
me: next week? he has off all of next week??????
j's teacher: (giggling uncomfortably at my obvious lack of good parenting) yup! just like it says on the calendar. have a good week!
me:..................
so hey, look at that! looks like j has off next week. and you know i would have had that poor kid up, dressed, and standing in the cold waiting for the bus.