ok. this is going to be a long one. so decide for yourself if you want to read the adventures of kalamazoo or not. but i had a great time so, hey, i thought i would share.

wednesday - i already wrote about my travel adventures with m. but i thought i held up pretty well. i managed to fly rushed and late and experience the pleasures of the "you've been selected for advanced security" portion of the trip. but for the record, when i got there i realized that i still had my leatherman (pocket knife/utility tool) in my purse! great job on security there guys! and i was the one they checked "closely." i also managed to find the hotel - directions were head west and it's downtown! but when i finally got there i was pretty sick to my stomach. between nerves and the long day i was beat.
i couldn't stop smiling as my head hit the scratchy smoke smelling hotel pillow.

thursday - what the heck is that? it sounded like the ceiling was going to come down on me and i could hear jackhammers. hmm. i am on the 8th and top floor. it appears that is where the construction is. walk to the window, and there looking back at me is construction guy. and not hot diet coke commercial construction guy, but scary butt-crack guy. ew. when i opened the door to the hallway there was temp carpet taped down and a bin to catch falling debris. it was nice when i checked in. honest!
went to m's session first. art and image in teaching medieval texts. fun, but i was getting tired of being introduced as an undergrad everywhere i went. so i ditched her and went off to a troilus and criseyde panel where a woman wrote a paper on the frontispiece (MS61) i had written a paper on that last year and spent some time chit chatting and making like i had a clue. then off to a session on border images in manuscripts. little creatures. butts that talk. nuns picking penises from a penis tree. and these are all in religious ms!!!
was very brave and went to dinner in the bar alone. big step for me.
travelling alone was a harsh look at how i view myself. i had to admit every insecurity that i had squirrelled away. it was tough, but worth it.
met up with ssp after dinner and had a great time. it was good to feel a little more like equals for a couple of hours. he was somewhat amused by my excitement over the sessions. seems he is old and cynical having been there 8-10 times.

friday - missed the first session, or most of it. went to the book exhibits! omg!! it was heaven. every critical work i could imagine on medieval lit and art. facsimiles everywhere. it was a gold mine. i also bought a 14th c. english breviary page. it's in latin (a gothic hand, 2 columns with illuminated caps, filigree work and gold leaf) i was beaming.
sessions - lollards, a panel of undergrad papers (i could have done better!), and a calligraphy/illumination class (again, i could have done better. the teacher was no more advanced than i am. it was fun though)
i cheesed out and spent friday in my hotel room watching 2 weeks notice and ordering room service. but it felt like being pampered and i was a happy camper.
got a little sniffly and weepy after watching romantic comedy. might have been the wine with dinner. but i didn't sleep well and was considering jamming the jackhammer right up the buttcrack of the sweaty construction guy and 8am!!

sat - continuining on my weepy moodswing, sat morning was tough. i was feeling drained from trying to be social all the time but my only other choice was being alone. i had proudly told m and ssp that i was doing fine and didn't need them showing me around. damn. now i wasn't going to admit i was geeking out.
but lunchtime came around and i wound up shopping (again!) with m. ran into ssp and made plans for after the dance. things were looking up.
met m for dinner to go out with a group of phds. wasn't really looking forward to it, but it was a blast.
sat next to pb who wrote the books i used to write my last paper!! after a martini i told him that i owned his book but argued against it. he thought that was pretty funny. invited me to lehigh univ. promised me a spot in the grad program.
four people asked me to submit papers to conferences and everyone told me to come back with them to the dance.
dum..da...dumm. ..dumm....the dance. picture the scariest wedding you have ever been to. quadruple the size. you're almost there. it took a lot of wine before i was cajoled onto the dance floor. dancing with 70 yr old guys doing some form of "white man's overbite" takes lots of wine. watching them all cut loose was funny. met up with ssp and others and didn't make it to sleep until 3:30. not a good plan with 7:00am check out looming.
oh. and scary buttcrack guy. a no show on the only morning i couldn't sleep in!! i know he planned that.

sunday morning - after visine and lots of caffeine i checked out and made it to the last panel. history and text. langland. morte d'arthur. fun! really! believe it or not there isn't the tiniest bit of sarcasm here.
there was a woman in the back in one of those hats that are created by crocheting pieces of snipped soda cans together. i didn't spot her til she asked a question. but as soon as i did i burst out giggling. trying to gain some composure i spin around quick. too late. i have been spotted. hot grad student lex (is that a porn name or what?) has seen me. he is now laughing too, not sure at who, but we bonded over the soda can hat.
we got a good laugh about it afterwards but i had to dash out after saying goodbye to ssp. sorry lex. maybe next year when your film career takes off. lol.

off to the airport. a little curious why my ticket doesn't designate aisle or window since i specified aisle. but then i saw the plane. one step up from a paper airplane. i had to duck to get in. i am only 5'3" and i lie to make myself that tall! the reason it didn't say aisle or window was because it was both! one seat on my side of the plane. two on the other. not even enough room for an overhead compartment over my half of the plane. and standard carry on luggage had to be checked. wouldn't fit. nothing bigger than a small laptop case would fit.
i was sure that the pilot was going to fun around the front and wind the rubber band before we took off.
oh. and ...
"please be aware that we are expecting some sever turbulence"
oh good. but i was so exhausted that i fell asleep before take-off and woke up in the air.

so...if you are still here...i had a great time. it was inspiring. i will be back next year and hopefully submitting a paper. it was a bit disconcerting to come home. no one seemed to want to debate chaucer or think that langland sounded like a good way to spend my summer. but i was myself for a few days. no pressure and no one to answer to. it was one of the best things i have ever done.