New Year's Eve. For people who don't get depressed this one could do it for them. Add to that the clouds pressing down and suffocating the sun, and you are asking for trouble. So, I suppose it is time to do the reflections of the past year.
I lost my grandfather. That was difficult. He was the last grandparent I had remaining and there is a hole now. It is even more difficult to watch my dad who feels this more than anyone else.
I suppose over all this was a good year though. I did a little of that 30-something "finding yourself." Not sure what the results are but I have discovered some strengths and some weaknesses. Some surprising - others not so.
I have made some new friends. That is something that comes as a surprise. Not the ability to make new friends, but finding some that feel like the kind of friends you had when you were younger. The kind that you would stick up for on the playground, share your lunch with when their mom made them something terrible, stay up late giggling with. Those kinds of friends are few and far between and can be counted on one hand.
School has gone well. Another surprise. Considering the first go around for me this has been fairly shocking. I still have a fear that they will figure me out - discover that I don't have a clue and have been faking it all this time. I struggle with trying to impress people who don't seem to notice and berating myself for caring what everyone thinks, but those are things that I still have to work on.
The kids are doing well. Connor started school and is turning into his own little person. Jake is settling in and figuring out who he is and that it isn't such a bad thing to just be himself. Things at home are going pretty smoothly in spite of my neurotic episodes.
So this year brought us Harry Potter, The Two Towers, a trip to Disney that feels like a lifetime ago, terrible Mets baseball that was more fun than I can remember, with a lot of new baseball fanatic friends...
Next year? Spring training, a trip to Kalamazoo to see what I am getting myself into, and an addition to the house that promises to stretch our living space, our budget and our nerves. Should be interesting!
I don't do resolutions well, so I will recycle all the old ones. I want to be more patient with the kids, more organized, procrastinate less, exercise more and lose some wieght. (I can cut and paste these next year)
Happy New Year everyone!